Good Enough
by Stillicidium
Summary: Hal receives a letter from Mello written before he dies. This is my first attempt. Please give constructive criticism. Thank you.


Halle Bullook of the SPK was the agent to be contacted by Mello. She complied with what he wanted her to do and told him what he wanted to know, holding little back. The information she gave Mello determined his courses of action. One could say that Mello eventually came to trust Halle. Halle certainly trusted Mello.

When she made her last phone call to him, she told him only what Near would permit her to say. He listened carefully to what she told him and when she was finished speaking said he knew what he had to do. He hung up the phone. Something in his voice gave Halle a small fear. A fear of what, she was unsure, so she ignored this feeling and continued with the work assigned to her.

On January 27th, 2010, Halle discovered an envelope in her apartment. On the front of the envelope, "Hal" was scrawled in black ink. On the back, "-Mello" was written the same way. When she saw this, Halle's throat seized. Mello had died yesterday. His death had come as a sad development for her, but not necessarily a surprise. She now thought that the small fear she had felt when she last spoke with him was a fear of the knowledge of his unavoidable death.

Being a secret agent, she was trained not to let her emotions get the best of her. She opened the envelope, her hands shaking so slightly that anybody watching her would not have been able to tell; only she would. Inside the envelope was a letter. She read it slowly out loud, her voice barely a whisper.

_Hal-_

_When you are done reading this, give it to Near._

_As I hope you know from the writing on the back of the envelope, the writer of this letter is none other than I, Mello. You are reading this, so I am most certainly dead. I would first like to point out that this is not a suicide note. I am positive that I was murdered. Obviously, with the kinds of lives you and I are leading, ten-to-one my murderer is Kira._

_I know it seems a fruitless attempt on my part for me to kidnap Takada, but I didn't kidnap her for selfish reasons. As I hope you know, I do actually think things through and don't just go with whatever will work in the next two seconds, even if it won't prove to have a positive outcome within the next two days. I say this because I know Near does not think this is how my brain works._

_If all has gone according to plan, Takada is dead. This will be very beneficial towards your goal of capturing Kira, especially the way in which she was killed. This is what will make or break who the winners of this battle are. Pay attention to this. I can't tell you more, because, frankly, I want to work for it, Near. It shouldn't be hard for you, right? Actually, I sincerely hope it isn't too difficult for your mind to put together. I gave my life for Kira's capture. It had better work out._

_From what you have read so far, I assume you have figured out that, yes, I do know what your plan is. On the 28__th__, Matt will be at the Yellow Box Warehouse. He's there to help your plan along. You see, I know a little more about the Death Note than either of you (or any of you, if this letter is shown to people other than Hal and Near), and what information I have has been given to Matt. My knowledge remains and it is as if I am there to help you. Matt will tell you what he thinks you need to know so that proper precautionary measures against Kira are taken._

_Hal, Near, I hope neither of you were hoping for a big, corny confession of my inner thoughts and feelings. That is not the purpose of this letter, nor is it the purpose of any letter I have written or will ever write. I simply wanted to put some things out there that I knew would have to be known. Really, Near is the only one who has to read this, but I know that you, Hal, would wind up reading it anyway. It is also easier for me to get this letter to you than to Near._

_I don't know at this point what my final words will be, and I don't think any person who is alive as you read this letter will know, but take these to be my final words: I would have preferred it another way, but this is good enough._

_-Mello_

Halle was working hard to control her breathing. Even though Mello had said the letter was not meant to convey his thoughts and feelings, she felt that it somehow had. The sentence he that he wrote should be taken as his final words seemed uncharacteristic for Mello. She thought perhaps he wrote many drafts of this letter and finally decided that it was good enough this way.

Matt was dead, so he would not be at the warehouse the next day. No one would ever know what it was that Mello had wanted to tell them through him. Halle cursed silently to herself, pretending it was from the fact that her team would be deprived of this information, but it was really because she didn't want any of this to be happening. She didn't want Mello to be dead and she didn't want to have received this letter. It brought up emotions that she had tried to destroy, making her feel weak and vulnerable. An almost non-existent tear slid down her cheek.

Halle folded up the letter and put it back into the envelope. She felt suddenly emotionally numb. She had no idea what her feelings were. She just didn't care about things all of a sudden. Nothing really mattered. That was okay, though. She remembered this feeling from when her mother had died. It would pass.

Halle had no intention of giving the letter to Near, even though she felt she should respect Mello's final wish. She knew Near would be able to solve everything on his own anyway.

She had only minutes earlier walked into her apartment, but she left after putting the envelope containing the letter into her purse. She kept a pensive look on her face as she strode down the busy sidewalk outside, heading nowhere in particular, thinking about the final line of the letter: "_I would have preferred it another way, but this is good enough."_ She decided it was good enough. Whatever it was, it could have gone better, but when things being better just aren't an option, good enough will have to do. What Mello had done would have to be good enough.


End file.
